In his own words…

Written by Rescuing My Marriage’s husband about how he ended up cheating on his wife, involved with the Other Woman and the lessons learned since he came clean. So much of what he wrote is relevant to my own husband’s affair and how he ended up cheating when he never wanted to have an affair even while he was in it.
Another reader commented on her blog that now she understands why a wife will choose to stay and fix the marriage, and how a man can change his “cheating” ways to become a better husband than before.
Thank you…..

Rescuing My Marriage

As many long-time readers and subscribers of this blog know, I have wanted my husband to document his journey in his words.  It’s hard to put the entire journey into one piece, because it spans many years, has many aspects (as you know from reading my side) and many turns, valleys and victories too.  To try and capture it all in one piece is impossible.  I hope he will write more, or compartmentalize the task into smaller sections and talk only about those things (i.e. his vulnerabilities at the time, his true feelings for the OW, why her, the struggle to free himself from the affair, the decision to tell me, the story of how he told me, the fallout, the healing, forgiveness etc.)

Four years ago I took the first step of a journey that would alter the course of my life.  I didn’t know it at the time…

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3 thoughts on “In his own words…

  1. Did you struggle with admitting your guilt and shame to your wife? I am a year and 8 months out since D-day and waiting for my husband to really show it to me. I know that a big part of it is that he probably doesn’t feel safe in doing so because of how I might react. Not reacting to my thoughts and feelings is something I am working on, yet struggling with.

    I am just growing impatient, but knowing that you two are 4 years out tells me to just give it more time.

  2. Why was life so difficult? What does middleage have to do with it?
    You say that you love your wife but it was not enough to stop you.
    I applaud your honesty and willingness to help us to understand this, but you seem to feel pity for yourself. I cannot understand having intercourse under duress. I did not think mens bodies worked that way. I don’t see you experiencing the same “pain” and wishing to die. I too love my husband, but cannot see him the way he was.
    What was it that made you think that you could do this? Noone knows.

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